It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
