Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
