No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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