So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Randomize
