he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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