Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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