Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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