Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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