my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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