I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
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