My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
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