How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015