can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell