Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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