Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
