Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
