its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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