Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
