if i can run in heels then i can drive
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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