Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize