Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
