Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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