Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I pour the whiskey from now on
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
