does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
