i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
this is an emotional support booty call
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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