the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
