She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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