I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize