My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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