I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
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