I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID