so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
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I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
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She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.