I will die if light touches me.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
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