That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
