ya dads aren't the best wingmen
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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