Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
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