its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I have already put on my inside pants.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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