I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize