I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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