you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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