That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
