why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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