brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
