I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize