I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
