Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
