She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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