He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
