What did we do last night that was yellow?
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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