Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.