walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
